Aftermath

Is it sad that I am so drained by my visit that I don't even have the energy to read? I am sitting...just sitting on the airplane looking out the window, unable to bring myself up from this incredibly deflated state. I know it will pass in time, but it shocks me how completely wasted I am after only three full days. It wasn't all bad...but there is such an air of overwhelming stress in that household alone and it wears on a person.

Shame on me for dwelling on the stressful parts of the week, though. Along with the unfortunate state of my family's affairs, you will also soon be seeing some of the good memories I took away from Nebraska this time aroud. Let's just say it has something to do with cigars and high powered rifles.

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Tomorrow

Tomorrow we're headed home, my brother and I. We will part ways, he to North Carolina and I back to Seattle. We came together from the farthest opposing sides of this country to meet right in the middle;not only in the heart of the country, but also in the heart of our family, its history, and its utterly saddening complexity.
This was meant to be a vacation, a break from the stress and a chance to review my life. I knew when I bought the tickets out here it was going to be anything but, but I suppose I'd hoped I could deal with it better. No such luck.
As I prepare for tomorrow, the only thing I feel is sadness. That feeling arises for so many reasons. Tonight I felt the need simply to write something, anything to ease my newly troubled mind.
I know no one else needs to hear about it, but a break down of this trip is sure to come soon...

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